A New Year Begins…

With the approaching of a new year, we all begin making resolutions or at least dreaming about what might be.

Blank Notebook

“Tomorrow, is the first blank page of a 365 page book. Write a good one.”

― Brad Paisley

I love this quote not only because it pulls at my writer’s sensibilities, but also because it’s true. Obviously we are not always in control, and lots of what will happen may not be of our own doing. However, we can at least strive at doing the best we can.

Every year I have all these dreams of what I will accomplish or at least try. Like with most people, those things normally end up at least partially undone. As I get older though, I developed this sense of hurry, of urgency that was not there when I was younger. I’ve always been patient, willing to wait, never rushing. But for the past three or four years, I’ve had this need for speed. It’s almost as if, as my life draws near to the end, I realize I still have so much to do and possibly not enough time to do it. When you’re young, time just drags and old age is a very distant and abstract idea. When you get to my age, the end is suddenly very concrete. Most of the adults of your childhood are either dead or dying, your heroes, your idols, everything is dwindling down and you know that you’ll go sometime next.

Relaxed

I had always wanted to be a published writer. I had a knack for writing and did it constantly since very early on. My dream finally came true four years ago. Nine books later, I still find it hard to believe it actually happened. My next “dream” is to actually be mildly successful at it. It’s a very slow process and I get antsy. I don’t have a life in front of me to wait patiently for the world to discover my stories, I need it now. Talk about self-induced anxieties, lol.

Those of you who are in the last quarter or so of your life, getting ready to become silver foxes, do you feel this way too? This anxiety to accomplish a thousand things all at the same time and frustration of not having enough time for it? Or energy? It has gotten so bad for me, I avoid things I used to love (and still do) and that helped me relax so that I have time to finish that story, or work on that ad, or interact with my audience. It’s exhausting.

So for this new year I still want to accomplish all of that, but I also want to learn to relax, to allow myself those moments of blissful peace when there is nothing to do, no place to go.

What are your plans for the new year?

Sparkler

5 thoughts on “A New Year Begins…

  1. My plans for the new year are to get healed from surgery, hoping I don’t have to surgery again on other shoulder. To get somewhat healthier. Lose some weight. To read more. To pimp more for my favorite authors. I turn 62 in February. So time is going quicker than I want it to. But, such is life.

    Your books are brilliant!! I’m glad I discovered your writing. May 2019 bring you all great things. ❤️❤️

    Liked by 1 person

    • Thank you, Kathy. You’re very sweet. I so want to lose weight too. I know I’d feel healthier and my suffering feet would thank me, lol. But I do like those croissants at Panera 😉 Happy New Year.

      Like

  2. I’m sort of hoping I’m not in my last quarter yet (although that’ll depend on which set of grandparents I follow I guess! So I’m either in my last third or my last half. Either way, I completely understand – I feel the same. I do what I can depending on circumstances but do feel a definite sense of urgency to get on with my writing. (NB also re weight but it’s never quite so urgent I do anything sensible about it! Been on my ‘resolutions’ list for years now.)

    Liked by 1 person

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